Let It Be
by badkarma00
Summary: Remember this is just a short series of snippets in the life of the crew. I update when the mood hits me, or an idea comes to mind.
1. Chapter 1

Let It Be

_Author owns nothing except the ideas, and writes only for his own amusement and entertainment._

_--------------------------------------------_

The operative had been true to his word. No one was looking for them, no warrants had appeared on the cortex. And he'd even helped get _Serenity_ up on her feet again, something that Mal had secretly feared wouldn't even be possible.

But, they were back in the black. They didn't have a job, as yet, since most of their contacts were now dead, courtesy of the same man who'd helped them get off the ground again. Mal sighed, thinking about that.

There was no guarantee that things would stay quiet, of course. The operative had made that clear. Warrants might be re-issued. And Blue Sun didn't answer to him. Or apparently to anyone else. He glanced over to where River Tam was calmly piloting the ship from the co-pilot station. She seemed very at ease at the helm.

"I am," she smiled at him, and Mal resisted the urge to shudder. It was just creepifyin' how she did that.

"Can't help it," the girl said sadly. He looked at her, seeing the pain in her eyes. "Things done to me, made me this way. Can't turn it off."

"Don't worry none, little one," he smiled as best he could. "I know it ain't your fault. And, now that this is all behind us, maybehaps you can get things under control, once you get a chance to work on it. Your brother says ain't much you can't do, you set your mind to it," he added encouragingly.

"Perhaps," she nodded, clearly not optimistic. "At least I can function properly now. I can be a member of the crew, and do my share, instead of simply being a burden to others. But it cost so much," she murmured, turning to look out into the black.

"I know it did," Mal sighed, standing. "But we can't change what's past, albatross. All we can do is look forward. We're flyin', and, at least for the moment, we're free. Everything else will just have to work itself out." She nodded, smiling weakly, and Mal left the bridge, wishing he could give the girl some kind of comfort. But he didn't have any to offer.

He paused at Zoe's bunk, and almost knocked, but resisted the urge. If Zoe needed him, she'd ask, he knew. He wanted to offer her some comfort as well, but what could he say or do to make up for Wash? He shook his head, and walked on.

Entering the galley, he found Jayne sitting at the table, cleaning three of his weapons. The big merc hadn't had much to say since the battle, and didn't say anything now, simply nodding to Mal as he walked in, and then went back to his work. Inara was working on fixing something to eat for the crew. He smiled at her, and she smiled back, though not as brightly as she once had.

Inara was hurting too. Everything she'd ever believed in had been tainted by the haunting wave from Miranda. He knew she was working through that. He also knew, again, there was nothing he could do to help.

He passed through, heading on toward the engine room. So far everything was good, but any minute now, something could. . . .

He stopped short near the entrance to the engine room, seeing two very different legs draped off the side of Kaylee's hammock. Naked legs.

"I'm glad you finally got un-proper like, Simon," he heard Kaylee giggle, and almost saw red.

"I am too, _ai ren_," he heard Simon reply. "I am too."

Mal stiffened slightly, and was about to plunge into the engine room and wreak havoc on one Simon Tam when he felt a very large hand on his shoulder.

"Not now, Mal," he heard Jayne's voice whisper in his ear. "They's earned whatever happiness they can git. Leave'em be, for now." Mal whirled in his tracks, about to explode, when he saw the look on Jayne's face.

The big merc wasn't trying to get a better look at Kaylee, but instead was peering intently into Mal's own face. He lifted a finger to his lips, indicating quiet, and motioned for Mal to follow. Mal was torn now between his ire at Simon, and his new ire at Jayne for trying to dictate terms on his ship.

"C'mon, Mal," Jayne whispered again, waving. "Now ain't the time," he insisted. Mal looked back one more time at the two figures in the hammock, then reluctantly followed Jayne back up the passage to the galley. When Jayne didn't stop, but continued on into the bay, Mal followed, intending to give the merc a piece of his mind.

"What'n hell do you mean, tellin' me what to do?" he demanded as the two men made their way out into the bay.

"Ain't tellin' ya what ta do, Mal," Jayne said reasonably. "Just tellin' ya this ain't the time, is all. Them two ain't like the rest of us. They ain't never had to be mixed up in a sure 'nough fight like we was in. They been in shock for better part o' two weeks, at least. Leave'em be for now."

"For now?" Mal demanded. "What happens later?" Jayne smirked at him.

"I 'spect you'll huff and puff at Simon 'bout lil' Kaylee, threaten to space him and what not, and declare they ain't gonna be no romancin' on your ship. That's what ya normally do, anyway, so long as I ain't involved." Mal caught up short on that.

"What's that 'sposed to mean?" he demanded.

"Nothin', Mal," Jayne sighed. "Just makin' a point. Let it be, for a little while. Simon ain't stupid. He knows if her hurts her, one of us'll kill 'im, and his sister be damned. I almost killed him over her when she got shot. And he knows that, too."

"I don't like him no more than you do, Mal," Jayne continued. "But Kaylee does, and that's what counts. Or oughta, anyways. It ain't for you, nor me either, to dictate how she lives. What we can do is make sure that Simon knows for sure that if he hurts Kaylee, he won't never need be worried 'bout warrants and Blue Hands again."

Mal eyed Jayne in near shock, listening to what the man had to say. He didn't know what was worse. The fact that Jayne was practically agreeing with him, the fact that he was making sense, or the fact that he was still trying to dictate how things were going.

"Jayne, it ain't your place to make decisions on this ship," Mal warned, and Jayne sighed. He sat down on a nearby crate, and rubbed his hands across his face.

"Mal, I ain't trying to make no decisions," he said wearily. "I just didn't want you bustin' in there, britches on fire, and doin' or sayin' somethin' you'd regret come tomorrow. Like I said, them two ain't never been in nothin' like we just did. Ain't never seen nothin' like it. And they ain't used to it. Not like me, you and Zoe are."

"They need some time to get over that, and maybe some help. So far as I can see, they're helpin' each other. Each one clingin' to the other for support. And Kaylee's been moonin' over Simon since he walked up the ramp, all sissified. You can't deny that, and you sure can't change it. 'Side," he smiled wolfishly, "they been goin' at it fer the last two weeks. You're a bit late to be stoppin'em, I'm thinkin'."

"You knew about this?" Mal demanded hotly. Jayne nodded.

"Reckon prob'ly everybody did, 'cept you," he chuckled slightly. "They ain't hurtin' nothin', Mal."

"I promised her daddy I'd look after her!" Mal almost screeched.

"And did a good job of late, too," Jayne didn't quite sneer. "Draggin' her all over the 'verse to protect two fugies, then through reaver space and into a gorram battle we was lucky to live through. I reckon, _Cap'n_, after all that, she deserves a bit o' happiness, can she find it. If he makes her happy, then let it be, Mal. Let it be."

Mal's retort died on his lips as the weariness in Jayne's voice, and on his face, got through to him. He looked at the big man closely.

"What's wrong with you, Jayne?" Mal asked. Jayne looked up at him.

"What? Nothin'! We ain't talkin' 'bout me."

"You don't seem right," Mal said frankly. "Ain't like you." Jayne just shrugged.

"Got a new lease on life," he said simply. "Ain't dead like I figured to be, so I got to start over, like. Don't rightly know what to do, that's all. Reckon. . .reckon I owe it to Book to straighten up a bit. That's all."

"And you're tellin' me you ain't got a problem with Simon and Kaylee?" Mal challenged. Jayne's face went neutral at that.

"You know I do," he said quietly. "But it ain't my decision. Her's. Just her's. And I'd never try and tell her what she oughta do. You know how I feel about Kaylee," he added. "But there ain't nothin' for her with a man like me. Nothin'. Happen Simon can get clear of his legal troubles, he can give her a good life."

"And, at least for now, he makes her happy, Mal. That oughta be all that matters to me. And to you, even more'n me. You're tryin' to be her pa. Then try thinkin' like one. She's happy. Let her be happy." Jayne stood, suddenly tired.

"Let it be, Mal. Just let it be." With that Jayne walked back up the stairs, disappearing into the galley. Mal watched him go, mind working.

-----------------------

Simon was still trying to get the infirmary reworked. Nothing seemed right anymore. He was just finishing a cabinet when Mal walked in.

"Hello, Captain," he smiled. The smile died on his lips at the look on Mal's face.

"What has she done?" he sighed, reaching for his bag. "I'm sorry. I'll. . . ."

"Ain't got nothin' ta do with yer sister, doc," Mal didn't growl, though he wanted to. "Come to my attention that you're showing my mechanic a good bit of attention." Simon blushed at that, but looked Mal in the eye.

"That's our business, Captain," he said quietly, but firmly.

"See, that's where you're wrong," Mal shot back. "But, so long as she's happy, then I don't see how I can rightly say nothin'. But I'm warnin' you now, Simon, plain and clear. You hurt that girl, in any kinda way, and I will end you. Throw you straight out in the black, and never lose a wink over it. You got that?"

"Yes," Simon managed not to stammer. "I have no intention of hurting her, Captain. I. . .I've. . .that is, now that. . . ."

"Don't need the pa'ticlars," Mal held up a hand to forestall Simon's explanation. "I just wanted to make sure you knew the consequences. If I don't get you, then Jayne will. Either way, you won't live to regret any harm you cause that girl. _Dong ma?_"

"Yes," Simon replied simply. That seemed the best way to respond.

"Well, then, in as far as you need it, you have my permission to court her," Mal allowed grudgingly. "You shoulda asked _first_, mind, but that's all behind us. Just treat her right, you wanna keep breathing." Mal turned to leave.

"Thank you, Captain," Simon called out to Mal's back.

"Thank Jayne," Mal shot back over his shoulder. "He's the one convinced me to let the two o' ya's be."

The look on Simon's face would have kept Mal laughing for weeks if he'd seen it.


	2. Chapter 2

Being

_Author owns nothing except the ideas, and writes only for his own amusement and entertainment._

_--------------------------------------------_

Simon walked into the bay, following the noise of clinking metal. When you wanted to find Jayne, you usually could find him near that sound.

Sure enough, the big man was on his weight bench, straining over and over to heft a bar that Simon was sure weighed more than he did. He shook his head in amazement, and walked slowly over.

"What'cha need, doc?" Jayne asked long before Simon got there. Startled, he stopped.

"How do you do that?" he asked.

"Do what?" Jayne replied, settling the bar into it's rest, and sitting up.

"Know that it's me, without looking. For that matter, how do you know I'm here at all?"

"Smell you comin'," Jayne shrugged, wiping the sweat from his body with a towel.

"What?" Simon almost yelled, offended. He was the cleanest person on this ship! How dare this. . .this _ape_, accuse him of _smelling_?

"Smelled you comin'," Jayne repeated. "And get that look off yer face, Simon. I didn't say you smelled bad. Just said I could smell ya. Everyone's got a smell." Simon thought that one over for a moment.

"So you can identify all of us by smell?" he asked, curious. Jayne nodded.

"What do I smell like to you?" Simon asked. His natural curiosity got the better of him sometimes.

"Like a hospital," Jayne smirked. "You smell like a clinic. Clean, ani'septic like. And a touch o' rubbin' alcohol."

"I. . .I hadn't. . .I suppose I do," Simon finally managed. "I never thought about that." Jayne shrugged again.

"What's on your mind?" he asked, looking at the younger man. Simon looked a little uncomfortable.

"Mal and I, we had. . .well, he did all the talking, actually, but the discussion. . .that is, he came to see me last night about Kaylee and I." Jayne looked at him, grinning.

"Ripped ya a new one?" he asked, chuckling softly. "Oughta seen that comin', Simon, you a near genius and all."

"Yes, well," Simon spluttered. "I admit it was short sided of me to underestimate the impact of our relationship upon the captain. He does, after all, view Kaylee as his daughter, of sorts, and he takes his responsibilities very seriously."

"You got a point under all that Simon?" Jayne asked, eyes rolling a bit. Trust the core-bred sissy to take all gorram day to say two minutes worth of talk.

"Yes, I do," Simon tried to regain some momentum. "He, the Captain that is, has given me his consent to continue to court Kaylee. When I thanked him, he informed me it was you who had convinced him to allow it. I wanted. . .I wanted to thank you."

"Welcome," Jayne nodded, rising to his feet. "Reckon Mal made all manner o' threats ag'in ya, was Kaylee to be hurt?" Simon nodded.

"Figured so. Thing is, Mal, he talks a big lot, but he's not likely to really do any real harm to you, just kick ya off the boat." Jayne smiled slightly, but his smile was suddenly cold. "Me, on the other hand? I ain't much on talkin'. So let me just add, if Kaylee winds up hurt over this, I'll kill ya. Dead. _Dong ma?_"

Simon fought the urge to swallow. It was obvious that Jayne wasn't blustering as he normally did, or talking just to hear himself talk. He meant it.

"I understand," he nodded solemnly. "And I won't hurt her, Jayne. I love her, very much."

"Figured," Jayne nodded. "Take good care o' that girl, Simon. I ain't playin'. She sheds so much as a tear in pain, and you'll never see me comin'." With that the merc gathered his things and headed for his bunk.

"Thank you," Simon called out to his back. Jayne waved a hand over his shoulder in acknowledgment, but never slowed.

Leaving Simon to wonder why it was that he was always thanking the people on this boat for threatening to hurt him.

----------------------

Jayne walked through the galley on his way to his bunk. River Tam was sitting at the table, and Jayne slowed as he realized she was staring at him intently.

"I would not allow you to hurt him," she warned. Jayne smirked.

"He hurt's Kaylee, even you won't be able to stop me, Crazy," he assured her.

"I can kill you with my brain," she retorted. Jayne let loose a short bark of laughter.

"And I can kill you with my bare hands, my guns, my knives, and any number o' other ways," he replied, never losing eye contact. "You ain't the only one can sneak around, Moony, so you best be thinkin' on that. I ain't got nothin' ag'in ya, especially seein' as ya saved our hides on Universe's Moon. Fact, I'd figure I owed ya one, wasn't on account o' you we was in that spot to start with. But don't push me."

"You know I can take you," River replied almost scornfully.

"I know you think you can," Jayne shrugged. "And that works for me, not you." With that he continued on his way, leaving River to contemplate their discussion. River turned in her seat, staring at the merc's retreating back.

"Stop starin'," Jayne shocked her. "Ain't polite."

River's mouth was still open in shock when Simon walked into the galley.

---------------------

Zoe was leaving the bridge when she met Jayne in the passageway. He nodded at her.

"How you doin', Zoe?" he asked kindly. His voice was so soft that the warrior woman stopped dead, looking at him.

"I'm dealing," she said simply, after a minute's thought. Jayne nodded.

"He was a good man, Zo'," Jayne said kindly. "I'm sorry." The emotion in Jayne's voice was soft and carrying, and for once Zoe never doubted that he meant it.

"Thanks, Jayne," she tried to smile, but didn't quite manage.

"Welcome," Jayne nodded, then kicked open his hatch, and eased down into his bunk. Zoe watched him go, then headed on aft. She walked into the galley, where she found the Tams in a discussion.

"It's not what it sounded like," Simon assured River, finding himself in the odd position of defending Jayne, of all people, to his sister.

"I will not allow. . . ."

"What's all this?" Zoe asked. River looked up at her.

"Ape man has threatened my brother," she said flatly. "I will not allow him to harm _ge ge_."

"River, he didn't threaten me. . .well, okay, he did, but it wasn't like that. The Captain threatened me the same way. They're both merely trying to. . . ."

"Captain threatened you?" Zoe broke in, frowning. "And Jayne too? Why?"

"About Kaylee and I," Simon's face went a shade redder. Zoe chuckled at that, realizing now what the ruckus was over.

"I fail to see the humor," River said, eyeing Zoe darkly. Zoe turned flat eyes on the smaller woman, and River could feel the pain, and perhaps the blame, all the way through her. She recoiled slightly at that, and Zoe nodded, having made a statement without making one.

"Captain feels responsible for little Kaylee," Zoe informed her. "Jayne. . .well, at this point, I'd say Jayne just feels protective. Your brother," she nodded at Simon, "is sleepin' with her, and, I hope for his sake, intends on courtin' her, and makin' an honest woman of her. Jayne and the Captain are just makin' sure that Simon knows the penalty for makin' Kaylee cry, I'd imagine." Simon nodded.

"That's what I was trying to explain, thank you," he sighed. "They aren't threatening me, _mei mei_, except in regard to their feelings for Kaylee. They're doing no less for her, than I would for you. Did for you," he added. River considered that.

"I do not require protection now," she said firmly. "So that is not a valid comparison. . ."

"River, there's more than one kind of protectiveness," Zoe cut in. "If you meet a boy you like and start. . .whatever," she smiled at Simon, and was rewarded with seeing him squirm uncomfortably, "then Simon will feel the need to let that boy know he best be observin' the proprieties, if he knows what's good for him. That's all this is," she concluded, heading to get some coffee.

"I see," River mused. "So if I were to start sleeping with Jayne, Simon would threaten Jayne?" she asked.

"_What!?_" Simon bellowed at the top of his lungs, as Zoe spewed coffee all over the counter top.

"Interesting," River noted their reaction. "Perhaps I _was_ wrong in assuming that ape-man was simply threatening to harm _ge ge_ for no reason. Thank you both for the enlightenment." With that she stood and headed for the bridge, leaving the two of them speechless. Mal walked in just as River was leaving.

"I do not plan on sleeping with the ape-man, Captain Daddy, so there is no need to threaten his life," she said seriously. Before Mal could recover, River was gone. He looked to Simon and Zoe, both still apparently in shock.

"What'n the hell was that about?" he asked. When no one answered, Mal turned to the comm.

"Jayne, get your _pi gu _to the galley _right now!_"

"Sir, you got this all wrong," Zoe finally recovered. "She was just. . . ." she was cut off by Jayne's arrival, running into the galley with Vera, his boots unlaced.

"What is it Mal?" Jayne asked, looking at Mal expectantly. "We gettin' boarded? What ya need me ta do?" Mal looked at him for a moment, startled by Jayne's quick appearance, and his willingness to follow orders. Then he remembered why he'd called him.

"You been tryin' to seduce that child?" Mal demanded. Jayne's look would have left Zoe and Simon in stitches, had they not still been recovering from River's announcement.

"Huh?" That was the best Jayne could manage. He'd come running, expecting something to be wrong.

"I asked you a . . . ." Mal started, but Simon intruded.

"Captain, I promise you, this is all on River. We had a misunderstanding about the little, erm, talk that both you and Jayne had with me concerning Kaylee. She's the one who used Jayne in comparison to herself. Probably to get just this reaction," he sighed.

"What about Kaylee?" the little engineer bounced into the room, smiling. "Who's talkin' 'bout me?"

"We weren't at the moment," Simon assured her, as Kaylee pecked him on the cheek, and sat down beside him. "We were talking about how River misread what the Captain and Jayne said to me when they found out about. . .um. . . ."

"What did they say?" Kaylee demanded, her eyes narrowing as she looked at the two men in question.

"That ain't the point here and now," Mal waved his hand down. "We're talkin' about Jayne and River."

"What about Jayne and River?" Jayne asked, his own eyes narrowing. "She threatened me, Mal, not the other way 'round."

"What? Why?" Kaylee demanded. Simon rubbed his temple, feeling a headache coming.

"She threatened you?" Mal asked. "What did you do, Jayne? So help me, if you laid said anything of a sexual nature to that girl. . . ."

"_What?_" Jayne bellowed. "I ain't said no sucha thing! I'd rather stick my head in the engine than even _think_ about that moon brained girl like that, Mal!"

"Hey!" Simon and Kaylee both objected. "Ain't no need for name callin', Jayne," Kaylee said reproachfully.

"I'm just sayin'," Jayne told her. "Ain't no way in _hell_!"

Through all this Zoe merely observed. She'd never say so, but she was really enjoying all this. It was a wild misunderstanding, so there was no chance of anything bad happening, and, once this was all over with, everyone would get a good laugh from it. Just as she thought that, Inara walked in.

"What's all the shouting for?" she asked innocently.

"Jayne's been. . . ." Mal started.

"Mal accused me o'. . . ." Jayne started

"This is all a misunder. . . ." Simon started.

"They's talkin' 'bout me, 'Nara. . . ." Kaylee started.

Inara retreated a few steps as everyone started talking at once. Finally, unable to take it any longer, Zoe burst out laughing. Everyone stopped talking, looking at the first mate questioningly.

"Want to tell us what's so funny?" Mal finally asked.

"All of you," she waved at them. "Save Inara, of course, who just happened into the middle," she added, smiling at the other woman. Simon nodded, starting to chuckle himself.

"I don't see what's funny!"Kaylee said indignantly. Simon wrapped his arm around her shoulders, standing and taking her with him.

"I'll explain everything," he promised, guiding her toward the stairs. "Let's go and sit down, since this will take a while."

"Captain here," Mal announced. "I ain't done talkin'."

"Zoe can explain better than I can," Simon assured him. "There's nothing for you to be mad about, Captain, I promise."

"River thought that Jayne was threatenin' Simon for no reason," Zoe began.

"You threatened Simon?" Mal demanded. Jayne nodded.

"Yep. Same as you," he added.

"You threatened Simon?" Inara demanded of Mal. Mal nodded.

"Yep, I did," he replied. "'Bout what might happen to him, was he to hurt Kaylee." He looked at Jayne. "That what you did?" he asked.

"Yeah," Jayne nodded. "Just makin' sure he understood the rules is all," he added to Inara. The woman looked at him for a moment, then smiled.

"I think that's very sweet of you, Jayne," she told him, and Jayne beamed at that.

"Hey!" Mal looked indignant. "I threatened him 'fore Jayne did!"

"And I'm sure you did a very good job, Mal," Inara patted his shoulder gently. Mal looked mollified at that.

"I take it you don't need me no more?" Jayne asked, laying Vera over his shoulder.

"I still wanna know what River meant," Mal looked at him accusingly. Zoe snorted.

"Simon was trying to explain to River why the two o' you felt the need to threaten him. Girl wasn't gettin' it. I told her Simon would likely do the same thing, once she found a boy she liked, and River seized on it. She said then if she started sleeping with Jayne, Simon would threaten him the same way."

"Well, that ain't never, _ever_, gonna happen," Jayne muttered darkly. "_Ever_," he added for extra emphasis.

"What if she were willin', Jayne?" Zoe teased. "Sure you could resist?"

"Ain't but one woman on this boat I can't resist, and that's not a issue," Jayne surprised them all. "And she ain't the one, neither. That crazy, crack brained girl'd be as like to stab a man in his sleep as to cuddle around him. 'Sides that, I don't like her much, nohow. Now, can I go?" he asked Mal.

"Yeah, you can," Mal nodded. "Sorry I jumped to conclusions there, Jayne."

"No harm done," the merc shrugged, and started for his room. Mal shook his head, and headed for the bay. Inara and Zoe looked at each other for a moment.

"Kaylee?" the two said at the same time, then burst out laughing.

"It's sad, in a way," Inara remarked. "I'm tempted to feel sorry for him."

"Me too," Zoe agreed. "Jayne ain't all bad. Just mostly," she added.

"I think it's time I had a talk with River," Inara announce. "Make sure something like this doesn't happen again. Want to tag along?" Inara regretted the invitation as soon as it was out of her mouth, but it was too late.

"No, I think I'm gonna get some sleep. I had the late watch," she stretched. Truth was, Zoe couldn't help but blame Wash's death on the Tams. She'd like think she was dealing with that, but sometimes she wasn't sure. She started toward her bunk, and Inara walked along with her.

"If you need to talk, Zoe. . . ." Inara began.

"Just need to sleep," Zoe smiled tiredly. "See you later.

"Zoe are you sure you're okay?" Inara asked.

"No, but I gotta keep on being," Zoe shrugged. "Otherwise I'll just curl up in a ball and wait to die. That ain't my way." They stopped at Zoe's hatch.

"He'd want you to keep 'being' you know," Inara replied. "He loved you far too much to want you to curl up and wither away."

"I know," Zoe smiled, and for once, it touched her eyes. "And I will. Thanks, Inara."

"Anytime," Inara nodded, heading to the bridge.

"River, I think we need to talk," was the last thing Zoe heard before her hatch closed, and she couldn't help but smile again. Inara might have an easier time than Simon did.

But she doubted it.


	3. Chapter 3

Pretty

_Author owns nothing except the ideas, and writes only for his own amusement and entertainment._

_--------------------------------------------_

"What should we talk about Inara?" River asked, turning in her seat after turning on the auto-pilot. Inara took the co-pilot's chair, pausing for a moment to gather her thoughts. This had to be handled very carefully.

"River, dear," she began, smiling. "There are some things you simply shouldn't say. Not on this ship, at any rate. I'm sure you were just having fun at Mal and Jayne's expense earlier, but things like that have a way of getting out of hand on _Serenity_."

"Is this about my sleeping with Jayne?" River asked, grinning. Inara sighed.

"Yes, it's about you saying that," she nodded. "That wasn't a very proper thing to do, River. Mal tends to over-react on things like that, and Jayne, well, Jayne isn't usually someone who tolerates over-reaction very well. You could have caused a real problem, had no one else been privy to what was happening."

"But I was joking," River told her, confused. "Well, I wasn't, actually, since I would never contemplate sleeping with Jayne."

"He wouldn't with you either, dear," Inara nodded in agreement, thinking she was making headway.

"He wouldn't?" River's tone changed perceptibly. She looked. . .disappointed, almost.

"No, dear, he wouldn't," Inara assured her, for once not reading body language correctly. "He has no interest in you what-so-ever. But what you said could have led Mal to believe that Jayne had made advances toward you. Improper advances," she added, seeing that River wasn't taking the hint.

"Jayne doesn't find me attractive?" River asked. Inara sighed again.

"Jayne does not find you attractive, nor does he desire you in a physical way," Inara confirmed, her frustration making her speak more bluntly than normal.

"Because she is ugly?" River asked, her lip trembling. Suddenly realizing that River wasn't taking the news that Jayne didn't find her attractive very well, Inara tried to sooth River's injured feelings.

"River, no, you are not ugly," she said firmly. "But that doesn't mean that Jayne finds you to his liking. And he has stated in no uncertain terms that he does not. Nor does he want to sleep with you. But my point was about the way you went about teasing. . . ."

"If Jayne doesn't find her attractive then she must be ugly," River said quietly, turning to look out the window. "Jayne is not very selective in his choice of potential bed mates. This implies that his standard of female company is rather low. And if she does not measure up even to that, then it must be because she is ugly. Unattractive. Undesirable. Unwanted."

"River," Inara cut off the continuing diatribe. "This isn't about whether you are attractive or not. It's not even about whether or not Jayne finds you attractive. It's about the way you have of saying things in such a way that everyone misinterprets them and then leaps. . . ."

"Do not try and console her, Inara," River almost sobbed. "She is ugly. She didn't know she was ugly. She has always thought she was pretty."

"River you _are_ pretty," Inara grated. Her frustration level was rising. "You aren't paying attention. This isn't about how pretty you are, and you are pretty. It's about not saying things in such a way that the people on _Serenity_ can so easily take them the wrong way."

"So I am pretty?" River brightened slightly. "If you think I am pretty then I must be. You are a Companion, after all, and you are beautiful."

Inara felt her temple throb slightly. She wasn't getting anywhere, and this was just making her more frustrated. She felt a headache threatening.

"Yes, _mei mei_, you are very pretty. And I am a Companion, so I should know."

"Thank you, Inara," River beamed, and hugged the older woman. "I am so glad we had this talk." With that River turned and bounced off the bridge.

"But, River, I wasn't. . . ." Inara called out, but then stopped as River simply continued on her way.

_No doubt on her way to creating even more mayhem,_ Inara thought with despair. Well, she had tried. Maybe Mal would have better . . . .

"What am I thinking?" she murmured to herself. "If I can't get through to her, there's no way Mal can." With a sigh, Inara went to get a smoother for her headache.

-------------------------

"So all this was about them trying to look after me, then. Is that it?" Kaylee was sitting on the sofa with Simon, hand in hand, as he tried to explain what had happened.

"That's it," Simon smiled. "Neither of them want to see you hurt, that's all. And River, being River, took everything out of context, and before you know it, Mal got involved, and. . . ."

"And there it was," Kaylee grinned. "Cap'n does have a way o' takin' things all lopsided."

"That's putting it mildly," Simon actually laughed. "Anyway, that's all there was to it."

"Well, good," she grinned, leaning over to kiss him lightly. "Now that we got all that worked out, how 'bout we. . . ."

"Simon, ape-man thinks I am _ugly!"_ Simon groaned.

"Oh, no."

-------------------------

"River you ain't ugly, sweetie," Kaylee tried to console River, who was sobbing gently.

"River, did Jayne _say_ you were ugly?" Simon asked, having already been in the center of one monumental misunderstanding earlier that morning.

"What?" Mal's voice broke into the conversation. They all spun around to see the Captain standing at the foot of the stairs off the bay, a cross look on his face.

"Captain Daddy, Jayne thinks she is ugly!" River almost wailed. Mal's face looked disturbed for a moment.

"He done said that?" Mal demanded. "Why in. . . ." He walked to the com.

"Captain, wait. . ." Simon tried, but to no avail.

"Jayne! Get your _pi gu _down to the lounge, on the double!"

"Not again," Simon sighed, sitting back to wait for the inevitable.

Two minutes later, Jayne was standing in the lounge, gun in hand, looking at Mal.

"What is it Mal?" he asked, looking about him pensively. Mal's face was contorted in anger.

"What in the hell do you mean, callin' that child ugly?" Mal demanded. "Ain't she got enough problems with her self-esteem as it is?"

"Huh?" Jayne's face betrayed his confusion. It was a look that the rest of the crew were becoming used to seeing today. "What child?"

"River!" Mal yelled at him, pointing toward the sniffling girl.

"Jayne I can't believe you'd say something like that!" Kaylee said crossly. Or at least as crossly as Kaylee was capable of.

"I think we should make sure that we aren't jumping to. . . ." Simon tried again, only to be cut off.

"I. . .what in the hell are you all _talkin'_ 'bout?" Jayne demanded angrily. "I been in my bunk since that mess in the kitchen!"

"And somewhere along the way found the time to go insultin' little albatross here!" Mal shouted, getting angrier by the minute.

"I ain't even _seen_ her since this morning!" Jayne bellowed. He turned an angry look at River. "Girl, I don't know what the hell you're playin' at, but I'm gettin' _gorram_ tired o' this!"

"Don't try and turn this around on her!" Mal shouted. "She ain't but a child, and . . . ."

"A 'child' who killed 'bout thirty reavers all by her lonesome not two months passed!" Jayne retorted. "Seems to me she can look after her ownself, and be responsible for what's comin' outta her mouth! Which at the moment amounts to a bunch o' _go se_!"

"Jayne, I'm warning you," Mal threatened, just as Inara came down the stairs.

"What in the worlds is happening now?" she asked. She'd just wanted to get a smoother from Simon, and then go lie down. Was that too much to ask from life these days?

"'Nara, Jayne called River ugly!" Kaylee told her. But Inara's eyes were on River, who had gone strangely quiet. Inara gave her a withering look, then looked at Jayne.

"Jayne, I think River has something to tell you," she said calmly. Looking down at the girl, she added, "don't you, River?" River looked at Inara for a moment, then nodded.

"'Nara, this here ain't none o' your concern. . . ." Mal started.

"She is sorry, Jayne," River said quietly.

". . .and I don't. . . .what?" Mal stopped in mid sentence at that. "Sorry? What for?"

"I knew it," Simon said, shaking his head, then burying his face in his hands.

"Knew what?" Jayne demanded.

"I tried to have a talk with River about this very thing," Inara said crossly. "At first I thought she genuinely didn't understand, but now I think it's much more likely that she understands all too well."

"Well, I don't understand at all, and since I'm the Captain, somebody better start into explainin' pretty quick!" Mal ordered. Inara looked at him.

"I told River that Jayne had no desire to sleep with her. We all heard him say that. Isn't that true, Jayne?"

"Damn straight," Jayne nodded.

"And River," Inara continued, talking to everyone but eyes boring into the small genius, "decided that since Jayne didn't want to sleep with her, then she must be ugly. I can only assume, from what I see here," she shot Mal a look, "that River has come down here and told you that Jayne said she was ugly."

"What?" Kaylee still looked angry, well as angry as she was capable of, but now she was looking at River. "River, tell me you didn't do that," she pleaded. River couldn't look at her.

"She is sorry," was all she could manage. Jayne looked as if he were about to blow a gasket. He looked at Mal, his face a mask of anger.

"Can I go now?" he demanded, not nearly as politely as he had this morning. Mal, red-faced, nodded.

"Sorry 'bout that, Jayne," he said sheepishly, but Jayne wasn't having any this time.

"Sorry ain't gonna cut it, next time," Jayne warned. "Next time you call me like that, we better be gettin' boarded, cause I come runnin' up here again, somebody's gettin' shot." With that flat declaration, and one last glare at the cause of his problems, Jayne stomped back up the stairs. Mal turned his attention to his erstwhile pilot.

"River, this better not happen no more," he warned darkly. "This morning was bad enough, but I could write that off as a simple misunderstandin'. But I'm thinkin' 'Nara's right. You aren't misunderstandin'. You're goin' outta your way to cause these scenes. I ain't gonna have that. You get that?"

"She understands, and comprehends," River shook her head, still not looking up.

"Look at me when you say that," Mal ordered. Slowly River raised her head, looking at her Captain. Mal nodded, then turned to Simon.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to ya, Simon," he admitted. "Seems I recall you tryin' to keep me from over'actin' on this, and I ignored ya."

"That's okay," Simon shrugged. "River," he turned to his sister. "I'm very disappointed in you." With that he simply turned and walked away, leaving his sister staring at his back.

"That's it?" Kaylee asked, following after him. "You're disappointed?"

"It's the harshest thing she knows," Simon nodded, walking into his room. "She can't stand to disappoint anyone. That's how I tell her how I really feel about all this. If I scolded her, it wouldn't help. In fact, it would make it worse. This is better, trust me."

--------------------

"'Nara, I appreciate you tryin' to help," Mal said, after River skulked away, pouting.

"But?" Inara asked, eyebrows raised. Her headache was really booming now. Turning into a migraine, if she were any judge.

"But what?" Mal asked, confused.

"There wasn't a 'but' at the end of your telling me you appreciated my attempt at helping?" she asked, surprised.

"Nope," Mal smiled. "I really do appreciate it. Seems with her mind cleared up some, River's gonna be more like what Simon remembers. And it's awful easy for us common folk to get bored in the black. She's a pure genius. Gonna make for interesting times."

"I'd make sure she doesn't pick on Jayne for a while, were I you," Inara warned. "I think he's had his fill, for a while."

"True," Mal nodded. "I'll try and see to that. And, next time, I ain't gonna just assume he's done something awful, neither."

"That will probably help," Inara smiled weakly, then headed into the infirmary.

"What's wrong?" Mal asked, following her in concern.

"Talking with River has left me with a migraine," Inara informed him. "I need a smoother."

"Talkin' with River will do that to ya," Mal nodded. "Want me to get Simon?"

"I can get a smoother, Mal," Inara gave him a look. "All this because she jumped to a conclusion. She is pretty," Inara added, thoughtfully.

"So are you," Mal remarked off hand, then turned and left before Inara's pain fuddled brain could react.


	4. Chapter 4

Muddy Waters

_Author owns nothing except the ideas, and writes only for his own amusement and entertainment._

_--------------------------------------------_

Inara emerged from her shuttle after a good night's sleep. The smoother had knocked her out but good, and she had slept through the night. Rising early, before any of the others, she decided to surprise them with breakfast.

Pulling a heavy robe around her to combat the cool air of _Serenity's_ night cycle, she walked to the galley. Working quickly and quietly she prepared the morning meal. Just as she was putting the finishing touches on it, Jayne wandered into the galley, sniffing the air, looking for all the world like a great bear, following his nose to a bee hive.

"Good morning, Jayne," Inara said.

"Mornin', 'Nara," Jayne smiled back. "Boy, that smells great!" he exclaimed, looking at the table.

"Thank you," Inara smiled. "Take a seat. I'll call the others."

"Need me to do anything?" Jayne asked, moving to his seat, but waiting to take it.

"No, I actually have everything ready. Just sit, while we wait on the others." Inara hit the com, calling the others.

"Breakfast is ready! Come and get it before I give it all to Jayne!" Jayne chuckled at that, taking his seat.

"I 'preciate you straightenin' all that out yesterday, Inara," Jayne told her as they waited.

"No problem, Jayne," Inara assured him. "I thought I could help, but instead made it worse. Well," she amended, "I didn't make it worse, I suppose. River's a very. . .well, teenager," Inara shrugged her shoulders, her hands rising in a motion of surrender. "And now that she's more or less sane, I'm afraid we can expect more of the same, unless I'm much mistaken."

"I done had all I need, or can stand," Jayne grumbled. "Me and Mal ain't never got along too well to begin with, and her sayin' stuff like that just makes it worse."

"I don't think Mal will be quite so quick to judge you, from now on," Inara assured him. "He sees, now, that River is just. . .well, a teenage girl," Inara again shrugged. "They're always difficult, and she's a genius. That just makes her more of a. . . ."

"Pest? Problem? Aggravation?" Jayne tried to help, and Inara couldn't help but laugh. Jayne was struck by how musical that laughter was.

"I don't think it's that bad," Inara said through her laughter. "But I can see where you would think so. Perhaps she'll find a new target for her. . . ."

"_RIVER!"_ Simon's scream could be heard all over the ship, without the need for the coms.

"Or perhaps she already has," Inara sighed.

----------------------

"I didn't know!" River snapped, though making no move to leave her place in the door to Simon's cabin. In which both Simon and Kaylee were struggling to cover their nakedness.

"I just wanted to make sure you were awake for morning sustenance," River continued.

"I am, so thank you, and close the door!" Simon snapped. River stepped inside, closing the door behind her.

"From the _outside!" _Simon screeched. River was unperturbed by Simon's screech.

"What were you doing?" she asked, noting the red faces of her friend, and her brother.

"That's _none of your business!"_ Simon screeched yet again. "_Now get out of here, and knock next time!"_

"Never had to knock before," River stamped her foot sharply. Simon looked as if he were about to explode, though Kaylee was just smiling, as she clutched the sheet to her, covering herself.

"River," Simon made a visible effort to compose himself, difficult since all he was wearing was a pillow he clutched in front of him. "You know it's proper to knock before entering someone else's room. Now, please leave. Kaylee and I need to get dressed for breakfast. And we don't need an audience!"

"Fine," River huffed. She opened the door wide, stomping out. And leaving the door wide open.

"_RIVER!"_

-------------------------

"What in the name of Buddha is all that yellin' about?" Mal asked, walking into the galley just in time to hear Simon's final scream.

"I think River has found someone new to aggravate," Inara smiled. "Giving Jayne a rest, at least for the moment."

"I take it it's Simon she's pickin' on at the moment?" Mal asked, almost grinning.

"Seems so," Inara replied. "Meanwhile, breakfast is getting cold, and I worked very hard to prepare it, so sit, and eat." Zoe trailed in about that time.

"Was my morning to make breakfast," she said.

"I was up, and had nothing else to do," Inara shrugged, and smiled. "You can repay the favor some time."

"Deal," Zoe smiled, and Inara was delighted to see that the smile reached the first mate's eyes. They had all settled in when River came bounding in.

"Good morning, Inara, Captain, Zoe, Ape-man," she smiled, sitting down at the table. Jayne glowered at her, but the look merely bounced off as she took her place.

"This looks very good!" she sounded delighted.

"Thank you, River," Inara smiled.

"'Tross, you been harassin' your brother?" Mal asked, filling his plate.

"Merely went to make sure _ge ge_ was awake for morning nourishment," the little genius waved airily. "Not my fault he was caught _in flagrante delicto_." Inara stifled a laugh, managing to turn it into a small cough.

"In fla. . .what?" Mal looked confused.

"You don't want to know, sir," Zoe was grinning. "Trust me."

"Fine," Mal grumbled, returning to his plate. River suddenly looked at Jayne.

"You shouldn't be thinking about what Kaylee looks like naked!" she said sharply. Jayne started at that.

"What?" he demanded. "Kaylee was naked?" River stopped.

"River, I warned you about that," Mal growled from the head of the table.

"He was. . . ."

"River, he didn't know what it meant," Inara chided. "So he couldn't have know Kaylee was with your brother when you walked in unannounced."

"How do you know it was unannounced?" River asked politely.

"Because we could hear him yelling at you," Inara replied calmly. "And he wouldn't have yelled, had you not caught him. . .unprepared for visitors, shall we say."

"True," River allowed after a thoughtful pause. She turned to Jayne.

"But you have had those thoughts," she said firmly. Jayne's face reddened for a moment, and he suddenly stood.

"Be in my bunk, you need me," he said to Mal. Taking his plate, he headed that way. "Good meal, Inara," he added. "Thanks."

Mal made as if to say something, but Inara stilled him with a hand, turning her gaze to River.

"That was uncalled for, River," she said sharply. "It was mean spirited, and malicious. I'm surprised that a young woman of your obvious breeding would do something like that."

River sat quietly, looking at her plate.

"'Tross, this ain't. . .it can't continue," Mal said after a minute. He wasn't blustering as usual, nor was he growling. He said it flatly, and plainly. "I've had enough o' your tricks and such to last me a good while. I know Jayne ain't maybehaps treated you all that well, but as I recall, you did slash him across the chest with a knife for no reason. Seems to me, if he still owed you anything, he paid that bill and then some on Miranda, and during the battle."

"It stops, and it stops now. _Dong ma?"_

"I understand," River nodded, still looking at her plate. Mal decided to let it lie, for now, as Simon and Kaylee stumbled into the galley, Simon still looking red-faced and angry, while Kaylee was trying to hide her obvious mirth.

"River, if you ever. . . ." Simon began, then caught himself. After a deep breath, he was more composed when he spoke.

"We'll talk later," he warned quietly, taking his seat. Mal sighed. What had happened to the good old days, when all he had to worry about was finding work, avoiding the feds, keeping his crew fed and safe, making sure Jayne didn't turn on them. . . .

Okay, maybe they hadn't been so good, he admitted, taking another bite. But they had been _predictable_. Mal liked predictable.

And those days looked gone for good.

**********

Inara found Jayne later in the cargo bay, hefting his weights with an alarming anger. Inara wasn't a reader like River, but she was well versed in reading body language, and Jayne's was screaming rage at the moment. She ventured down the stairs, and sat on a crate near his weight bench.

"Jayne?" she said softly.

"What'cha need, Inara?" Jayne asked, never slowing.

"I just wanted to see if you were alright," Inara admitted. Jayne snorted, setting the weight bar into it's cradle. He rose, wiping his sweat off with a towel.

"Why wouldn't I be?" he asked, looking at her.

"After what River said at breakfast, I was afraid. . . ."

"I don't care what she says," Jayne sighed, closing his eyes as he worked his shoulders slowly to ease the strain of his workout. Inara couldn't help but admire how the muscles rippled.

"It seemed to have upset you, I thought," Inara responded. "And I know how you feel about Kaylee, so I was concerned." Jayne's eyes popped open.

"Kaylee?" he asked. "What's Kaylee got to do with it?"

"The one woman you can't resist?" she smiled. Jayne looked at her for a moment, then broke out laughing.

"You think. . .you thought I was talking about Kaylee?" he gasped between laughs, his eyes almost tearing up with laughter. Inara nodded dumbly, shocked by his reaction.

"Well, I wasn't," Jayne declared, his laughter ending. "I love Kaylee ta death, Inara, always will. She's like a sister to me. I admit, when I first came on board, I liked her. She's friendly, cute as all hell. What's not to like?" He grinned.

"But she ain't the one I'm talkin' about," he added, turning serious. "And it don't matter no way. I just don't like the Doc bein' with her 'counta what he did when he came on board. That's all."

"I. . .I see," Inara managed to cover her slip. Not Kaylee?

"But it's her choice," Jayne shrugged. "And I ain't got no right to butt in, and even if I did have the right, I like as not wouldn't do it. Kaylee oughta be happy, and Doc seems to make her happy. These days, that's about all a body can ask, I reckon."

"So it is," Inara agreed, not knowing what else to say. "But if you weren't talking about Kaylee, Jayne, then who. . . .?" She trailed off, looking at Jayne closely. If it wasn't River, and wasn't Kaylee, that left a rather limited field of options. Inara began to wonder if she'd stepped into something she'd regret.

Jayne looked at her for a long time, clearly weighing what he would say, or not say. Finally he sighed.

"You swear not to say anything?" he said at last. "I mean it, Inara. You got to swear you won't breathe a word o' this to no one."

"I won't violate your confidence, Jayne," Inara assured him. "And if you'd rather not tell me, then. . . ."

"I don't mind," Jayne smiled weakly. "It's. . .it's Zoe, Inara. She's the one I couldn't resist, was she to ask me for anything."

Inara nodded, not knowing if she should be relieved or disappointed that she wasn't the one. It was a disconcerting feeling.

"Zoe," she smiled. "I should have known that Jayne," she went on. "I made an assumption, that's all."

"You promised you wouldn't tell," Jayne reminded her, sounding like a kid in school suddenly, who had shared an earth shattering secret with someone, and was now re-thinking his decision.

"And I won't," Inara assured him. "I promise. It's enough for me to know that you're all right. Is this," she asked suddenly, "why River's constant ranting doesn't bother you as much as you let on?"

"Yeah," Jayne admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "Long as everyone thinks it's Kaylee, then no one'll have a chance to guess the truth. And maybe I ain't as dumb as River thinks, neither. I do think on Kaylee when she's around. Clouds her mind, I guess," he added with a mischievous grin. Inara chuckled softly.

"I'd say it does at that. Very crafty, Jayne," she praised him. She rose.

"If you want to talk, sometime, about this," she told him softly, "I'll lend you my ear, Jayne Cobb." Jayne looked at her, blinking hard at that.

"Thanks, Inara," he said at last. "I really 'preciate that."

"Anytime, Jayne. Anytime."


End file.
